Henceforth, I can only write verses and songs about she and I, of the things we never did and never got to do.
I believe no one can truly love her like I do, but I know I am not tbe one.
She deserves better, and I think she knows who is be that.
But I wish I could smother these feelings.
I have made a lot of mistakes; just being human doesn’t justify it or makes me feel excused for fuckups that are actually relatively small.
Yet even if my feelings have to locked inside for eternity, I hope you know that I will always, always love you.
More often than not, I wish you could trust and confide in me like you used to, even though I realize I have wounded the trust you had in me. I regret that every single day.
Now that we’ve sort of started talking again, all I hear are the bad things that are happening to you, the rest I only have to speculate, and the image I get is not encouraging.
You take my breath and you break my heart a little every day, but it never stops me from loving you more and more every day. We are not together, but there is something about us, and it keeps bringing us back, although through something as fragile as a thread of communication.
I do not know where your heart is, but I know that it is not with whom you are right now; maybe be with this other guy we know, or maybe, just maybe, with me. Regardless, I never leave room for doubt, mine is with you, always.
I know that things are going terribly. Although I do not physically resent what you’re experiencing, it hurts me as it hurts you. But I hold my tongue in fear that I may be crossing a line if I say anything else.
I don’t know what to do, my dear. The coincidences taunt me and make me wonder if they are indeed coincidences at all.
I love you, *****. I can hope for that to shed some light on me.
Yours devotedly, **